It occurred to me today that not everyone may know to what I am referring when I say, "a felt sense." And so I decided to write on this for the purpose of elucidation.
Amidst the many life paths, whether it be scientific, spiritual, or humanistic, to name a few, we have a primary mode which we come to receive, understand, and use energy; as information, pure energy, or consciousness. Our primary sense mode tends to be the way we best learn and how we tend to communicate in the world. Another way to describe this, is in thinking of light as a particle, wave, or in-relation-to something. For instance, those who first operate through use of information could be likened to those who see light as a particle. Those who tend to operate through use of energy may see light as a wave, and those who operate through the consciousness sense, may see light as in-relation-to something. Each primary sense mode has it's benefits and challenges, and although we have a 'go-to' many of us combine some degree of all three. For example, those who tend to receive and communicate through the information sense tend to enjoy facts, thorough explanation, the use of language, and enjoy mapping out the world through structure and form. They may also be very visually inclined, and enjoy the depth of analysis and understanding through the information they receive. This sense is useful as it allows us to create organization in our families, workplaces, the sciences, and also in tracking our own personal development. Structure supports safety and understanding by making it clear to others the boundaries of a particular system and provides data for seeing growth through change. Those who operate under the primary mode of energy, tend to be more vague in explanation. They receive information as a feeling tone, a 'felt sense' of something. And that feeling tone provides insight into the type of information they are receiving. They might feel or describe things as having texture, tone, or color. They may receive information that they can sense is life supportive or a hinderance. They can pick up on the feeling-tone of others, and sense how someone is using their energy, such as whether they are being authentic in their beliefs and actions. It has been explained to me that such individuals have the potential to be closer to what is considered 'truth' in that ultimately we all are energy. Therefore received as 'energy,' the information may be slightly less distorted as viewed through other lenses. However, although the aptitude exists, combining 'felt sense' with information helps one who is mystically inclined to make better sense of what they feel, and provides them with structure in terms of growth. Furthermore, it's the information sense that supports disseminating energetically received information through the use of language. In this way, mystics can act as guides to others in the development sensitivity to energy. The third mode of sensing is through consciousness, or through relationship. Those who learn and grow through this means tend to follow the path of relationship-to someone or something. They understand through the interaction itself which provides information about who they are as well as the being they are interacting with. They tend to be community driven, socially inclined, and relationship builders. They value union with other beings, and provide invaluable lessons of unity consciousness and support for the growth of all. Without such, many of us would be more solo in our journey without the conscious value of helping those in community. Consciousness people are the connecting mesh-weave and help provide the value of relationship upon our personal growth and development path. It is rare that any of us function in just one sense mode, but we tend to gravitate more often toward one or two. But our innate tendency can be the main thread for our personal path of development. However, it's important to notice which secondary mode we bring with us. A doctor who loves the biomechanics of the body, who also has a strong sense of community support and enjoys building relationships with patients would be someone who is information along with consciousness sense. The spiritual poet who writes and learns through relationships with others as well as with nature describes someone who is using energy along with consciousness. It's important to note that the awareness and cultivation of all three modes can make us more effective in our work and in building our life purpose. By understanding and building all three, we can better understand others and adjust ourselves to communicate more effectively, understand one another, and come to mutual agreement. Developing each sense helps us to value each other and to see what they add to our lives through their unique way of seeing the world. Someone who may have a brilliant scientific mind but may be lacking in valuing relationships can learn to see how their skill sets can better support a unified community. They may learn how their work and study support the wellbeing of all individuals. Someone who is more mystic may benefit from understanding through use of a 'map' to see where they are and others are in their growth and development. And they may also benefit through building their consciousness sense to learn the great value of relationship while growing toward their highest self. Holding lightly, perhaps playfully using the awareness of information, energy, and consciousness, we can understand where others are coming from, mitigating frustration, and develop wholeness within ourselves as well as our world at large. As it's been stated, we must start with ourselves. The outer, reflects the inner and those of which we come into contact are showing us ways we can grow, or ways we have grown, and ultimately add to the interwoven network of us all.
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Steady focus, one pointed mind, calm presence. Things to which we aspire. Meditation, "is this," "you are not meditating unless it is like...XYZ", or "I am not good at meditation."
What is meditation but a place for personal practice for growth and development. I came by a sustainable meditation practice by atypical means. After having dabbled in different techniques on and off through the years, from mantras, to guided meditations, open awareness, and body scans. I even noticed that in some communities people seem discuss meditation as though it were tribute to their spiritual currency. As if the more one meditates, the more a skilled spiritual practitioner. I don't know about that, but I can say that it's a bedrock for me to move into my day. I began practicing regularly during the midst of a medical concern which required me to be seated and still for forty-five minutes to an hour each day. Well then, I had no excuse but to make the most of that forty-five minutes. Out came a book on meditation practices and techniques, along with a short book of one page spiritual contemplations. I was "all in" after that first day from the sense of calm, ease, and peace that I felt for perhaps the first time since initially trying meditation. For some reason, something clicked into gear and it's been a steady pillar in my day since. 'Steady' in that I come to sit every day. But a 'practice' because it's nothing different than a relationship with myself or any other person in my life. Some days, grounded, clear, interested, other days, fighting with myself and the innumerable distractions. It is a day to day cultivation of learning about oneself through steady, consistent showing up, and willingness to be with what is. Some days, I can spend almost the entire time anxious, distracted and feeling unsafe about a current situation, emotional, or mental state. When it occurs to me that the experience itself is just information, showing my present state of being, I can sometimes soften and let go into a quieter experience. And so it has been, a gradual process of letting go of the mind, allowing, trusting. A handing over to something else. It's a process, a non-linear one as is my day to day unfolding. As new life challenges present, meditation can become disturbed, and I can even find myself disassociating from my body, going far off into some story and fear and unsure how to find my way back to something to firm to rest my attention. As I cling, and try to use my mind with all it's learned tools, I can have a tendency to get more stuck and distracted. Sometimes, I eventually just have to move into my day, other times, I exhaust myself to the point where I actually throw up a white flag to surrender, and sometimes...it works. The practice, it fluctuates. I notice that what shows up, often mimics my current state of being and then at times shifts to provide helpful tips and insights for the day. Although frustrated at times for the difficulty in putting those insights into use, I am seeing a pattern of development. As I learn to hone my focus in a quiet meditative state, I have ever so slowly been able to utilize the same skills in the other 14-16 hours of the day. That is say, coming back to center amidst stress, emotions, thinking, creating stories of things that aren't actually occurring or may never occur. Slowly, I feel my way to my center point of being, remaining internally aligned while observing parts of myself meander to the side, and then come back again. How else could I learn the difference between a calm center point verses being out on the periphery of thoughts and emotional upheavals without those same fluctuations? It's gradual, non-linear, process-oriented practice. The value in the distraction and dissociating into fear? I learn the contrast between being ungrounded, unsure, reaching externally for answers verses being rooted, centered with my inner resources at hand. Here, now, safely grounded, observing, open, curious. The process allows for application in the day, to know where I am, and from what standpoint I am using my energy to make choices and engage with others. It's a relationship, like any other we cultivate, and we start, where we are, right now, as I write this sentence, as you read it. Start where you are, greet yourself at your own front door. Enjoy the richness of you. I have come across a particular reoccurring teaching that seems to want to be known and take residence, "the Earth bends itself to support us." My first awareness of this message came while creating a restorative yoga sequence for class.
As a teacher, I guide students through a series of deeply held restorative postures, in order to calm the whole body system. In the development of those classes, I go deeply inward myself, making a space to let go. It's a participation between the mind and all the senses; 'how does the body want to be held?', 'what music would best accompany and bring nurturance?', and 'what needs to be said?' When the haze of the mind settles into a simpler, clearer state of being, messages often come through as teachings, guides, or sweet reassurances. And thus, I then embark upon a journey into what becomes the next class to be offered to students. One evening, mid-pondering some decisions of which my mind was grappling, I came across an inner message, "Make the right choice, you will be graced and supported...make the wrong choice...and you will be graced and supported. The world is made to be explored my Dear." And so I settled more deeply, held in those words. Such messages as above come forth in the safest and most quiet states of being. However, what comes through also act as guardians and caretakers of day to day life. I often forget, but all things true and needed for growth and prosperity always come back in some manner. Similar to dipping a new candle wick in hot wax, each time, the wax coats more and more of the wick, eventually becoming a candle to light the night. Put another way, as Jalaluddin Rumi shared, “Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.” And this can be in guise of a lesson, reminder, support, care, loved one, or all the above. Years later, I was out for a long walk with a close friend on the trails of some nearby woods. It was a stunning early spring day with the sun making it's way through the canopy of still barren trees. We were contemplating nature and Earth's cycles, our cycles, as we paused occasionally to listen deeply and speak more truthfully from our hearts, and tune into the felt sense within our bodies. My friend stopped at a point as we crested a hill to remind me of a truth from her experience "the Earth bends itself to support us." And as she spoke these words, her hands gently came up mirroring the hill upon which we stood, her hands meeting at the center, with an angelic smile upon her face. "Yes," and we stood still, taking a breath, taking in the words. The phrase sent my mind through a miniature cascade across the landscape of my life. I made connections with all the times the universe supported me, both in times holding me back, as well as times when the true need was to move forward. Looking back through those experiences, I couldn't help but find myself grateful for all beings who have showed up in my life. I sensed my gratitude for those whom I have loved easily as well as those of whom I have been challenged when crossing paths. All, equally important. And, how wonderful, to know there will be many more. On another morning following a particularly sweet mediation, while eating breakfast, the phrase, 'the Universe is conspiring for us' came through my awareness. I chuckled at this, and couldn't help but share this as a quote upon little white pieces of paper with clients and staff members of the health center where I work. I was surprised, that one person replied "I don't know how I feel about that...'conspires' is not a good thing!' " My response...."Isn't that just it? Doesn't the Universe want to shake us up a little bit? She's tricky." I think of the teachings of Hafiz and the whimsical way the Earth delights in surprising us with her love and sly smile to win us over. Most recently, I came across this in a book by Jane Roberts, "The Universe bends itself in our direction." Well, how about that? If I were to connect the dots right now....I think I would be forming an expanding spiral of exploring, creating, and loving understanding. I will end with this short poem, Write a million prayers on the walls of your existence, Tell me which ones bring you closer to God. Connect each, one by one, Take a step back, tell me what you see |
AuthorAs a person who is highly interested in the inner landscape through interaction with the external, I find it invaluable to express these experiences. Here, a collection of musings; experiments, potential truths, and ultimately, my unique pathway of creative learning and growth. Blog and website edited by scholar, literary enthusiast, horticulturist and friend Peter Dryden.
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