I am heading to the Cape for the weekend, some time away, without my cat, without work, without the use of electronics, at least the plan is set in this way ; ) I am slowly learning that my grumpiness, is often related to an unmet need for space, or attention, or some other sort, and not a reflection of a true state of my personality. It gives me much space for being and trusting of something larger. This morning, upon waking, I was contemplating a lack of separateness between how I show up day to day, and that which comes forth as intuitive nudges, emotional waves that send a message of 'there is something here to look at'. I often see myself through a lens of 'I am....this personality, this way, this locked in self' and needing help from something outside-whether that being a being with skin on, or a larger self that is separate from my usual identification. But this is a gross miss-truth. What feels more wholesome and true, with much more room to navigate and explore with kindness and inquiry-a relationship building, is that I am both. Both the stuck and the freedom, the habitual patterns and the way out of them, they are not separate but a path of awaking, of seeing and then slowly creating a new way, if chosen. In that, I will pause, for who is the writer? But a motivational wave moving through a persona that is expressing and wanting to be seen on the other side, by the self (with a little 's') as well as, apparently, by others-with skin on as Tara Brach humors about. And we are all of that, the inspiration and the reflectors, and needing each other to see and reflect different versions and perspectives back, for greater fullness and understanding, of creative knowing and seeing. I will leave with that, seeing, unfolding, allowing. Inspired by what John O'Donohue writes, "I would love to live like a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.” ...Toss this into the ethers, sending a splash of dye into the ocean. And I do think it is often like that...adding a drop of dye into the ocean, and slowly, slowly, we shift, we become something more, not less, not an undoing, but all of it, slowly shifting color, to contain it all, and all of life within this one, precious, drop. The lamps are different, but the Light is the same. One matter, one energy, one Light, one Light-mind, endlessly emanating all things. One turning and burning diamond, one, one, one. Ground yourself, strip yourself down, to blind loving silence. Stay there, until you see you are gazing at the Light with its own ageless eyes. Rumi
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AuthorAs a person who is highly interested in the inner landscape through interaction with the external, I find it invaluable to express these experiences. Here, a collection of musings; experiments, potential truths, and ultimately, my unique pathway of creative learning and growth. Blog and website edited by scholar, literary enthusiast, horticulturist and friend Peter Dryden.
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